Friday, March 25, 2011

Inter Species Wrestling presents BONER JAM (#7 in a series)

Inter Species Wrestling presents BONER JAM!
 Montreal, March 27th, Foufounes Electriques

Turning from the Inter Species Wrestling Title Match and the Contender's Clash to talk about the OTHER matches on the card, it is only appropriate that we talk about the ISW OTHER Title.

The current holder of the belt is PETA poster boy, Moohammad the Terrorist Cow. The Bovine Bomber was either unable or unwilling to cross the border to put his belt on the line at Exact Change Only, so he sent his "pet" the wrestler formerly known as Flip D. Berger to fight Addy Starr for him. Flip lost the match leading to Moohammad changing the name of his human pet from Flip to Shitty and challenging Addy Starr to a match (not to mention cyber-stalking her).

It's A... Yeah How Did You Know?
Cue Admiral Ackbar...

Did I say that Flip lost his match against Addy Starr? More like Addy WON that match, the same way that she has been winning all of her ISW matches over the past two years. Moohammad is convinced that he is the dominant species, but based purely on her performance in the ring, Addy may prove to be a shock (cattle-prod?) to Moohammad's smug world-view.

Perhaps more importantly, if the rumours that I have heard are to be believed, Addy Star has been a member of the 4-H club since she was a little girl. In fact, if my sources are correct, she has been punching cows and hog-tying steers since she was 8 years old.

If Moohammad doesn't come to his senses and begin treating Addy Starr as a very dangerous opponent, he may find himself leaving BONER JAM battered, beaten and beltless... and possibly branded...

And that is if he is lucky. If he is unlucky, the only trace of Moohammad that we may ever see after BONER JAM is Addy's new black and white saddle!

Will it happen? Will Addy win the OTHER Title? Will she turn Moohammad into a variety of leather goods sold on Etsy?

Well, I would like to think so, but let me consult my in-office expert...

Magic 8-Ball says:  
To find out, you will have to be at Foufounes Electriques this SUNDAY! SUNDAY!! SUNDAY!!!


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